Comedy

Facebook Fails: The 20 Weirdest Facebook Groups

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Give people a medium to organize in mass and you’re bound to get some strange special interest groups. Since the dawn of man, people have been banning together to form tribes that benefited their personal interests and Facebook has just stepped that up by about 10 x million times. Looking for a group that represents your fear of red headed people named Mark? Facebook has you covered.

microwave
[BoxTitle]Accomplishing something before the microwave reaches :00[/BoxTitle]

1.3 million strong. Open a soda, text your mom, build a house of cards. Anything that you put your mind to you can accomplish in the 1:35 seconds it takes you to warm up that bowl of instant oatmeal. It’s the little victories that count and this group is perfect for underachievers out there. Link


methcat
[BoxTitle]If 1 million people join, my cat will stop smoking meth[/BoxTitle]

31,000 strong. Sadly, his cat didn’t make it. Way to let a poor kitty down, Facebook. Link


white crayon
[BoxTitle]Nobody Ever Uses The White Crayon[/BoxTitle]

8,000 strong. Nobody likes the white crayon. It’s the most useless crayon in the entire box of 96. Just go ahead and kill it, Crayola. Link


mcdonalds brothel
[BoxTitle]Going to McDonalds for a salad is like going to a brothel for a hug[/BoxTitle]

402,000 strong. You get enough judgement from the world just for eating at McDonald’s, why bring on the excess judgement from ordering a salad. Just order your Big Mac with bacon and enjoy the gluttony like the rest of us. Link


wolfpack
[BoxTitle]‘Can i sit there?’ ‘Sorry, wolf pack only’[/BoxTitle]

261,000 strong. In the ’90s it was “Can’t sit here” from Forrest Gump and now it’s the wolfpack from The Hangover? Okay, whatever. No reason this Facebook group should exist, other than to trade movie quotes with strangers you’ll never meet. Link


crocs
[BoxTitle]I Dont care How Comfortable Crocs Are, You Look Like A Dumbass[/BoxTitle]

1.5 million strong. Okay, now we’re on to a legit Facebook group that’s actually trying to make a difference for all humanity. Would it be out of line to propose a Croc burning party? Lets melt those pieces of foot trash! Link


apple costume
[BoxTitle]Dressing up as an apple and chasing fat people[/BoxTitle]

175,000 strong. Are overweight people really scared of apples? Apparently 175,000 people think so. Link


2012
[BoxTitle]I will wake up on 12-21-2012 and say “Bring It”[/BoxTitle]

762,000 strong. Did the people of this Facebook bring it on Mayan Dooms Day? Doubtful. $10 says that crazed mob survival bunker is now back to its original cluttered garage state. Link


gta driving
[BoxTitle]Driving like a normal person on Grand Theft Auto[/BoxTitle]

261,000 strong. What kind of fun is this?! This is Grand Theft Auto we’re talking about, get in the car and run over some hookers and street thugs like you’re supposed to. Save the responsible driving for the real world. Link


short hoodie string
[BoxTitle]I Hate When One String of My Hoodie Becomes Longer Than the Other[/BoxTitle]

1.4 million strong. The horror. This is second only to when one shoelace touches the floor of a public restroom. Link


t-shirt
[BoxTitle]STOP MOVING!! I need to read your shirt[/BoxTitle]

300,000 strong. Here we have another Facebook group that has no need to exist, yet somehow managed to gain more members than the entire city of Toledo, Ohio. Some shirts just have no business being read by anybody. See above. Link


shawty
[BoxTitle]Who is shawty? Apparently she has a lot of rapper boyfriends[/BoxTitle]

759,000 strong. Whoever shawty is you can bet that everybody is trying to holla at her while she’s gettin’ crunk in da club wit her gurls. Girl is bout it, bout it! Link


panda-terror
[BoxTitle]Terrorists have two eyes, Pandas have two eyes. Coincidence? I think not[/BoxTitle]

280,000 strong. Has the F.B.I. looked into this? I really feel like the government is missing a serious national security link. Let’s go ahead and put raccoons on the most wanted list, too. Link


finger-stuck
[BoxTitle]Panicking when your finger gets stuck in something stupid[/BoxTitle]

770,000 strong. Okay, members of this group, if you’re constantly getting your finger stuck in strange objects, you’re not yet ready for using a computer. That’s a privileged you’ve got to work your way up to. Now go play with your Lincoln logs and Tinker toys. Link


kanye-interruption
[BoxTitle]I hate when you’re trying to make a speech and Kanye interrupts you[/BoxTitle]

480,000 strong. Gotta admit, this is pretty annoying, it happens all the time, too. Good luck, Kim K. May Kanye not interrupt you during the birth of your devil baby. Link


Find_X
[BoxTitle]The legend who did this on his exam[/BoxTitle]

1.1 million strong. This guy is a legend. A legend who repeated 10th grade geometry class. Link

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drifting shopping carts
[BoxTitle]Yes, I drift shopping trolleys[/BoxTitle]

100,000 strong. Keep pushing ahead, shopping cart race fans. You’re only 2.9 million fans behind NASCAR’s Facebook page. With a little effort, shopping cart racing will be the #1 sport in no time. Link


Anatidaephobia
[BoxTitle]Anatidaephobia — the fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you[/BoxTitle]

61,000 strong. If you’re not scared already, you should be, because there is a duck watching you somewhere and you won’t know until it’s too late. Jokes aside, I feel the existence of this Facebook group is a wake-up call to address our country’s mental health problem. Link


beer
[BoxTitle]“Beer Can” in an English accent sounds like “Bacon” in a Jamaican accent[/BoxTitle]

146,000 strong. Quick! Somebody grab a Jamaican and a Brit and let’s put this theory to the test. Link


bear
[BoxTitle]I hate it when you open your fridge and get punched by a bear[/BoxTitle]

150,000 strong. Has this actually happened to 150,000 people? Doubtful. Still though, nobody wants to be punched in the face while getting a snack and bears are notorious for hiding in refrigerators. Congrats on another pointless group, Facebook. Link

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1 comment

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