Comedy

Robotic Tail Makes it Easier Than Ever to Alienate Your Friends and Family

The Japanese have come up with a wearable robotic tail that allows humans to express emotions like dogs. Yes, the Japanese have finally hit a technology wall and run out of practical things to invent. How could anyone possibly need this?

Say you’ve injected so much botox into that crazy head of yours that it’s now impossible for your mutated face to contort into even the slightest facial expression, what to do? Strap on a robotic tail and let everyone know how frightened you are of thunderstorms. Nothing strange and off-putting about that, right?

The fashion abomination was invented by Japanese inventor and obvious creepy guy, Shota Ishiwatari. The device has been named “Tailly” and activates based on the host’s heart rate, moving to express emotion like a dogs tail.

Check out what the Kickstarter project for the Tailly has to say.

Tailly is fun to wear to parties, while out with friends or playing with kids. You could even wear Tailly on a date and express your true feelings through the wagging tail.” – Tailly Kickstarter

First off, chances are that if you would consider wearing this to anything other than a Halloween or furries party, you’re not getting invited to many parties to begin with. Nobody wants your robot tail knocking over the Chex Mix. Do I even need to state the obvious horror that would result from wearing this on a date? The date would begin at 8:00 pm and be over by 8:02 pm. Even two minutes would be a stretch.

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This is just one man’s dream though, surely this has no possibility of becoming a mass product, right? Wrong. We’re only a few short years away from becoming a society of dog people. Japanese company Neurowear is also in development of a tail (they also have brain-wave interpreting cat ears) that reads brain waves which signal the tail to wag or freeze up, depending on the person’s mood.

So we spent thousands of years trudging through evolution, ditching our tails along the way, only to decide we want them back? Bring on the apocalypse.

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Via Uproxx, Huffpost

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