To celebrate the DVD release of Looper, we’ve obtained some blog posts from the future. Year 2044 to be specific, the year Joseph Gordon Levitt and Bruce Willis meet in Looper, the gritty sci-fi action flick that is set to hit shelves on DVD and Blu-ray this holiday season. 2044 is a stylish dystopia run by mobsters who employ Loopers – assassins who do their dirty work.
Dive deeper into the world of Looper and pick up the Blu-ray at Amazon available December 31.
Loopers get paid in silver, but as we all know, silver has strings. So it’s not like you can walk into a bodega and buy energy drops with a hunk of bullion. It’s going to raise some eyebrows. However, currency exchange markets are available and offer good rates at the right moment. Until you’re ready to receive your big cash payout, you’re going to have to figure out how to stash that silver.
1. Dig a hole in the ground, about four feet deep, throw your silver into the hole and bury it.
This is basic stuff, people, just make sure you remember where you dug the hole, and don’t tell anyone. You don’t want anyone coming back in time to steal it.
2. You may want to try something with a little more style.
Maybe you’re one of those Patrick Bateman revival types that we’re seeing so often these days, and you want to outfit your home office with a koi pond. Why not submerge your silver, hidden under some fake rocks?
3. The “hiding in plain sight” strategy also could work.
Paint your bullion brown and use it as a doorstop. Or bookends. It’s so obvious, they’ll never get wise.
4. Use a knife to hollow out some random books on your shelf and use the empty space to hide your precious metals. Just make sure you’re not hacking apart any first editions.
5. Bury them in the dirt that nourishes your houseplants.
6. For the Looper at the top of his game, splurge on a subterranean vault with a remote alarm system.
You’ll rest easy knowing that your life savings are locked up under foot. Bonus: Installed with its own air filtration system, these walk-in vaults double as Safe Rooms in case you really, really screw up.
Check out a new trailer for Looper below and pick up the Blu-ray at Amazon available December 31.