Think your love life is rough? The Anorak reports that Gerard P. Streator of Waukesha, Wisconsin, was recently arrested and is being charged with committing “lewd and lascivious behavior”…for having sex with an old abandoned yellow sofa in public.
Caught in the act by an off-duty police officer out on a jog through the Pebble Valley neighborhood, Streator was spotted thrusting back and forth into the sofa’s cushion to please himself. When the officer called out to him Stanton turned tail and fled, leading the officer to pursue him into an apartment building (and help continue the officer’s proper cardiovascular fitness routine) at which point the off-duty officer called in the case.
Streator’s wife is supporting him in stating that nothing ever happened to the poor sofa and denies any allegations of wrongdoing on her husband’s part.
Police have not yet announced whether or not the sofa will be charged for its part in this heinous act.
The Smoking Gun has the hilarious court report: