Shroomed Out Ohio Man Rips Off Part of his Penis at Middle School

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“Psilocybin Mushrooms” courtesy of Getty Images

A Columbus, Ohio, man is recovering in a Michigan hospital after ripping off part of his penis in a hallucinogenic episode brought on by psychedelic mushrooms.

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The 41-year-old man was visiting friends in Ypsilanti Township, Michigan, when he decided to pick up some of the special shrooms. He doesn’t have a history of drug abuse.

Detroit Free Press reports:

Washtenaw County Sheriff’s deputies found the man naked and screaming after responding to a burglar alarm at Ypsilanti Middle School, 105 N. Mansfield St., about 1 a.m. Tuesday, Sgt. Geoff Fox said today.

The man was kneeling outside the school, bloody from the waist down, with parts of his genitals ripped off, Fox said. He said parts of the man’s body were transferred to the hospital with him.

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Sgt. Geoff Fox said that the man was in serious condition and that had he not been found, he would have died from extensive blood loss. Medical examiners said they were testing the man’s blood to see if the mushrooms, whose natural psychoactive ingredient is psilocybin, could have been laced with anything more dangerous.

Ypsilanti Township resident Brandon Simmons commented on the incident in Detroit Free Press, stating:

I don’t even know what to say — it sounds painful. Is he still alive? My prayers go out to him, and I hope he’s going to make it. Wow?….I’m at a loss for words.

So are we, Brandon … so are we.

But maybe this man’s future is porn, right John Bobbitt?

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