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Boy Scout Leader Destroys 200 Million Year Old Rock Formation

Glenn Taylor, a Boy Scout leader, may face felony charges for destroying a 200 million year old rock formation in Goblin Valley State Park, located in Emery County, Utah. Unfortunately for Glenn, taping his actions, as seen above, means that prosecution won’t have to prove much.

Glenn was with several friends exploring the park when he felt a loose rock. Glenn and his amigos reckoned that the rock might be dangerous, as it could potentially fall on someone, and decided to destroy one of the ancient mushroom-resembling formations, known as “goblins.”

Goblins formed because of weathering of the soft sandstone beneath them. It is thought that this area was once an ancient sea.

Goblins formed because of weathering of the soft sandstone beneath them. It is thought that this area was once an ancient sea. Image and Information via Wikipedia

The video depicts the men cheering at their victory over 200 million year old geology.

“We have now modified Goblin Valley. [Now it] exists with this boulder down here on the bottom. Muscles here pushed it off.”

They laugh and high five each other. Glenn, however, says that as he walked back to his car, he wished he would have contacted a park ranger instead.

Glenn's friend smiles after Mr. Taylor destroys a formation  that has existed over 2,000,000 times their combined age. Image Credit: YouTube Screencap

Glenn’s friend smiles after Mr. Taylor destroys a formation that has existed over 2,000,000 times their combined age. Image Credit: YouTube Screencap

Eugene Swalberg, spokesman for Utah State Parks, would likely agree. He said “It is not only wrong, but there will be consequences.” A criminal investigation is underway and Glenn et al could face anywhere from a Class B misdemeanor to a second-degree felony, depending on the value of the formation.

In a move of predictable ineptitude and lack of self-awareness Glenn said “Glad we did it, wish we wouldn’t have done it.” Glenn does not realize you cannot feel both of these things.

This Venn diagram explains how one cannot feel regret and gladness for a past action as they are mutually incompatible. Glenn, they're opposites.

This Venn diagram explains how one cannot feel regret and gladness for a past action as they are mutually incompatible. Glenn, they’re opposites.

Swalberg commented on the unique nature of the formations saying “Some things can’t be replaced, like photographs in a family album, but they have great sentimental value.” Unlike photographs in a photo album, however, these formations originated in the Jurassic Period, when many dinosaurs lived.

It stands to reason that if Glenn saw a dinosaur, he would kill it with a gun, even if it wasn’t hurting anyone, because Glenn doesn’t appreciate priceless, irreplaceable natural occurrences.



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1 comment

  1. Really? Let’s put a dollar value on a fraking rock? jezuss people wake up. Yea natural treasure blah blah blah. What if it had just fallen by itself? IT”S A ROCK!

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