If there’s one defining photography archetype of the 80s and 90s, it’s the “glamour shot.” Families, children, pets, and business partners alike all huddled together to capture some of the most cringe-worthy portraits.Here are the top 20 that the Internet can’t explain.
1. Young Love
Nothing says romance like dropping it like it’s hot.
2. Where Mermaids Come From
Mommy and Daddy met one summer day in the lake.
3. A 90s Movie Promo
This looks like three ’90s movies rolled into one.
4. Vet Dad
Bringing a little bit of ‘Nam home at the end of every work day.
5. Cat Whisperer
How she got all these cats to sit still and get along. (Witch.)
6. No Idea
Your guess is as good as mine. But let’s keep it PG-13.
If you look up “virgin” in the dictionary, you’ll see this guy’s photo.
8. Baby Born Baby Born
Oddly enough, the baby was born between photo takes.
9. Grandpa Makes It Rain
Unfortunately after this shoot, he lost all his money in a Nigerian email scam.
Street cred officially ruined.
11. The Bacon Brothers
Strangely enough, they’re Jewish.
12. Young Love 2
$20 says their unborn child already has barbed wire tattoo.
13. David Bowie’s Acid Dream
This is how Labyrinth came to be.
14. Doctor Claw’s Office Portrait
It ain’t business unless you’re stroking a cat.
15. The Sloths
Mom, dad, and baby.
16. Blond on Black
Let’s just hope kitty doesn’t want some…nipple.
17. Falcor Lives
The inspiration behind everyone’s favorite furry dragon.
18. The Heavy Defender
To get him to put down the sword, just offer him a burger and fries.
19. Buck Norris
Meet Buck Norris, Chuck’s estranged cousin.
20. Domestic Love
Please let that shiner be Photoshopped.