Full Release: Music

 

It’s new music day, ladies and gentlemen, and we’re all over the map this week, from funny white dudes with bad haircuts to sad white dudes with bad haircuts. That’s what the music industry calls “diversity.” Let’s up periscope and see what hits the rack this week.

RammsteinLiebe Ist Fur Alle Da – we’ve already covered the disgustingly pornographic music video for the lead single off of this platter by one-hit German industrial rock wonders, and there’s not really much else to say. They dress like tools and make synthesizers cry. If you unironically like this music there’s probably some other stuff you unironically like that could get you arrested.

Flight Of The Conchords I Told You I Was Freaky – I seriously can’t count the number of girls I know who want to bone one or both of these New Zealanders, who star in the musical comedy HBO program of the same name. Literally, these dudes have hypnotic command over hipster chic underpants gravity. But does playing their music guarantee the same effect? There’s only one way to find out. This new disc is songs from Season 2 and forwards.

Julian CasablancasPhrazes For The Young – I never got into the Strokes – there was just something too contrived about their self-styled Lower East Side indie rock for me, like they were grown in a laboratory from Hanson cell scrapings and discarded toupees. But you know what? The tracks leaked off of Casablancas’ solo project are actually pretty compelling. Who would have thunk it?

Sufjan StevensThe BQE – This guy wears butterfly wings on stage and plays the banjo, making him some sort of time-traveling gay Appalachian hipster fairy. If you think that is in any way a good thing, please seek professional help.