It’s Father’s Day, a day to honor some of the special men in our lives. And, if these special men have senses of humor, then you have come to the right place. Check out some of the best quotes and messages that you can use for your greeting cards or ecards this year.
1. Dad, you’re my favorite person to borrow money from.
2. Happy Fathers Day, Dad! I wouldn’t trade you for anything. Of course, nobody’s offered me anything.
– Melanie White
3. The message of Mother’s Day is “Mothers are amazingly good at mothering! They deserve a special day!” Whereas the message of Father’s Day is: “We’re only doing this because we have Mother’s Day.”
– Dave Barry
4. My 4 year old made me a card for Father’s Day. Cheap bastard.
– Brian Hope
5. I’d be honored to buy you a Father’s Day meal with the credit card you pay for.
6. I tried to get my dad what he really wants for Father’s Day, but Jennifer Lawrence wouldn’t return my calls.
– Melanie White
7. Fathers Day, when you get that lethal combination of alcohol and new power tools.
– David Letterman
8. Dad, may your Father’s Day be better than your jokes.
9. Can’t remember what’s supposed to happen if your father sees his shadow today.
– Just Bill
10. If you ever want to torture my dad, tie him up and right in front of him, refold a map incorrectly.
– Cathy Ladman
11. I phoned my dad to tell him I stopped smoking. He called me a quitter.
– Steven Pearl
12. My father makes money the American way. He trips over stuff and sues people.
– Dominic Dierkes
13. Maybe Darth Vader was just mad because he never got a World’s Best Dad t-shirt or coffee mug for Father’s Day.
– Ashley @ashleycrem
14. My dad said I’d never amount to anything. Lucky guess.
– David Cousins
15. A father is someone you look up to no matter how tall you grown.
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