Betty White is America’s sweetheart and she has spent years winning over fans in the role of Rose Nyland on The Golden Girls. The delightfully dimwitted Rose made up the legendary foursome, which included the intelligent and sarcastic teacher Dorothy, the blunt Sicilian Sophia and the slutty southern belle Blanche. Betty White is the remaining cast member, as Bea Arthur, Rue McClanahan and Estelle Getty have all passed away years ago. But, let’s focus on the fun and the hilarity of The Golden Girls, in honor of these four women and in tribute to Betty White. Read on for some of the best and funniest quotes from the sitcom.
Rose: Tell me, is it possible to love two men at the same time?
Blanche: Set the scene, have we been drinking?
Blanche: Well, nobody ever believes me when I’m telling the truth. I guess it’s the curse of every devastatingly beautiful woman.
Blanche: Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go take a long, hot, steamy bath with just enough water to barely cover my perky bosoms.
Sophia: You’re only gonna sit in an inch of water?!
Rose: I don’t think lying is really a good idea. I once cut school and that proved very bad.
Dorothy: Oh, Rose. We’ve all cut school. It couldn’t have been that bad.
Rose: Oh, yes it was. That was the day they taught EVERYTHING.
Dorothy: The final piece of the puzzle.
Rose: My mother always used to say: “The older you get, the better you get, unless you’re a banana.”
Blanche: I treat my body like a temple.
Sophia: Yeah, open to everyone, day or night.
Rose: Can I ask a dumb question?
Dorothy: Better than anyone I know.
Blanche: I don’t really mind Clayton being homosexual, I just don’t like him dating men.
Dorothy: You really haven’t grasped the concept of this “gay thing” yet, have you, Blanche?
Blanche: Well there must be homosexuals who date women.
Sophia: Yeah. They’re called lesbians.
Sophia: Fasten your seatbelt, slut puppy. This ain’t gonna be no cakewalk!
Blanche: I do love the rain so. It reminds me of my first kiss.
Dorothy: Ah, your first kiss was in the rain?
Blanche: No, it was in the shower.
Sophia: Beat it, you 50-year-old mattress!
Dorothy: Ma, you’re making this up!
Sophia: So what? I’m old, I’m supposed to be colorful.
Blanche: What was your first impression of me?
Rose: I thought you wore too much makeup and were a slut. I was wrong. You don’t wear too much makeup.
Sophia: I need the money for my old age.
Dorothy: Old age? You don’t leave fingerprints anymore.
Rose: You don’t understand. Everyone likes me-I’m the nice one! Dorothy is the smart one, Blanche is the sexy one, Sophia is the old one, and I’m the nice one! EVERYBODY likes me!
Sophia: The old one isn’t so crazy about you.
Dorothy: Why don’t I just wear a sign that says, “Too Ugly To Live?”
Blanche: I have writer’s block. It’s the worst feeling in the world.
Sophia: Try ten days without a bowel movement sometime.
Dorothy: You’ll have to excuse my mother. She suffered a slight stroke a few years ago which rendered her totally annoying.