John Oliver, host of Last Week Tonight on HBO, always ends his shower with a surprise of sorts, but on November 10, he pulled out all the stop to finally stick it to coal king CEO Robert Murray, and performed an entire musical in the middle of Times Square to the new original song, “Eat S*** Bob!”
Bob, the owner of Murray Energy, the largest independently owned coal operators in America, first sued the HBO series two years ago for defamation and lost. In an episode that aired on June 18, 2017, on Oliver called him a “geriatric Dr. Evil,” and the show’s “meticulously planned attempt to assassinate the character and reputation.”
Judge Jeffrey Cramer of West Virginia ruled, “I find the arguments set forth in the Defendants’ Motion to Dismiss for Failure to State a Claim and Reply well-founded, appropriate in this matter and will grant the same. The Court adopts, with little exception, Defendants’ argument in support of their Motion regarding all issues addressed in the same.”
However, the lawsuit cost HBO over $200,000 in legal fees, even though they won, and a tripling of their liable insurance premium. Oliver said his show reached out to Murray to review the details of tonight’s episode, which they discussed his SLAPPs (Strategic Lawsuits Against Public Participation), but he again accused them of “scurrilous attacks” and argued that none of his lawsuits were SLAPP suits.
In 2018, Judge Cramer also added that “loose figurative language that cannot reasonably be understood to convey facts,” which basically translates to as Oliver said, “jokes are fine.”
So, instead saying a bunch of “loose figurative things about Bob Murray,” Oliver said, “On behalf of every small newspaper and individual he’s sued, and on behalf of every employee that’s been ill-treat by his company, and wanted to tell him to ‘eat s***, but couldn’t” — Oliver sang it.
Fast forward to 21:06 for the star of the grand musical number: ‘Eat S*** Bob!”
The ‘Last Week Tonight’ Musical Number Was Heralded As A Success
It’s a big risk to try and pull off a musical routine during a late night political news series, but based on the audience reception via Twitter, the dancing number worked brilliantly. Most users online were unaware that Oliver could even sing, let alone sing and dance, however, the Emmy winning series host can apparently do it all.
All The Lyrics to ‘Eat S*** Bob!”
We went to court
Against the world’s worst sport
And learned important lessons on the way
We spoke with perfect candor
Got accused with slander
Cause Bob Murray wants to make us pay
So even though he’ll threaten
We have just one tiny thing to say
Bob Murray can go f*** himself today!
Ladies and gentlemen, to help me with a better response to Bob Murray’s complete bulls***. Please welcome to the show, The S*** My Balls Bob Dancers!
Murray, Murray, Murray, Murray
Hey Bob! Watch this!
He went to The Louvre to spit in Mona Lisa’s face
Filled a rocket with puppies and shot it into space
He bludgeoned Nancy Kerrigan and watched her cry for fun (Why?)
He murdered Archduke Ferdinand and started World War One!
That’s right, if we discussed Bob Murray in a way that no reasonable person could strew as factual. We can say whatever the f*** we like! So come on everyone! Let’s head to the streets!
Construction Worker: He’ll stroll into a stranger’s home and jizz right in their Wheaties
Passerby: He’ll let you steal Magnolias and roots for diabetes
Lady with Baby Stroller: He wrote the Macarena and he dots his I’s with hearts
And even worse he likes to blame Malala for his farts!
Hot Dog Vendor: Hey! What’s the big idea?
John Oliver: We just used protected speech to tell Bob Murray to eat s***!
Hot Dog Vendor: Bob Murray? Is that the guy who dipped his balls in my hot dog water?
Oliver: That’s exactly who I’m talking about!
He doesn’t like Tom Hanks
He cut off Van Gogh’s ear
Told Hitler to quit painting and to find a new career
He masturbates to Schindler’s List/Old Yeller makes him hard
He was Cosby’s drug supplier, Jeffrey Epstein’s prison guard
One day at the M&M Store
Bob Murray walked through the door
He wasn’t wearing pants that day
His d*** and balls on full display
He grabbed M&M’s from a bowl
He crammed them up his (Anal Hole!)
He spread his butt cheeks far and wide
He told the tourists to look inside! (Look inside?)
He said “My rectum’s full of treats, reach in there and grab some sweets!”
(Grab some sweets!)
These are all real things Bob Murray did
Oliver: Look! It’s Mr. Nutterbutter! We’re singing about Bob Murray. I believe you’ve heard of him
Mr. Nutterbutter: You mean The Zodiac Killer?
Oliver: That’s the one!
Mr. Nutterbutter: Well my friends have a little something to say about him
The Nutterbutter Quartet:
Bob, Bob Murray is a furry
Putting aside our personal quarrels
The man f*** squirrels!
Hey Bob! This is bad as you feared
It doesn’t count as Slander!
Cause it’s way too weird
We made up these anecdotes
We’re silly and insane
We could go on and on and on
And on and on and on and on
But we all know that this song may have really fried your brains
SO EAT! S*** BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB! AND YOW!