Kaitlyn Herman Kaitlyn Herman of "Big Brother" shares what she learned from her mistakes on the show and what type of gameplay she finds problematic.
Kaitlyn Herman may have been evicted in week four of “Big Brother 20,” but she managed to make a big impression during her short time in the house.
Herman, now 27, won Head of Household in week two and successfully backdoored her former alliance member, Swaggy C. She was also known for having a big personality and flirting with several of the guys in the house. Ultimately, Herman’s “Big Brother” fate was sealed when she failed to complete a timed puzzle that would’ve given her a second chance after being evicted in July 2018.
Heavy had a chance to chat with Herman about how she’s changed since her time on the show, her thoughts about season 23 and the “Big Brother” strategy she finds problematic.
‘I Didn’t Love Myself’ During BB20, Herman Says
Although being a reality show contestant feels like a fever dream at times, Herman’s actions in the “Big Brother” house had real-world consequences, namely the unraveling of her relationship. Herman told Heavy that she didn’t realize how much she needed external validation until she went on the show.
“When I was 24 and I played the game, I was in a very different place. I didn’t love myself nearly as much as I thought I did,” Herman said.
“When you’re taken away from your friends and your family and anyone that gave you previous validation in the outside world and you’re thrown in with 16 strangers, if you don’t love yourself, you’re gonna keep seeking that validation until someone gives it to you.”
Herman said that’s exactly what happened when it came to her interactions with fellow houseguest Tyler Crispen. He felt like the only source of comfort when Herman’s alliance was turning on her. Herman has often been asked if she forgot the cameras were on her 24/7, based on some of her actions in the house.
“You don’t forget, you know that they’re on, but the repercussions of your actions are not immediate,” she said. “You’re like ‘oh I’m gonna be here for 99 more days,’ so you don’t care. So when I’m writing on Tyler’s hand “I want to kiss you right now” while I have a whole a** 4 1/2-year boyfriend who I love very much at home, I’m like this is how I feel in this moment, surely he’ll understand that I’m emotionally going through something right now.”
How Herman Has Changed Since the Show
Herman said that she knew immediately after leaving “Big Brother” that she had to work on her self-worth. “After the show, I went through so much personal growth,” she told Heavy. She sees her experience on the show as a gift.
“It’s a beautiful opportunity to rewatch yourself and be like, ‘Wow, there’s some inner work that needs to happen here,'” she said. If Herman were on “Big Brother” again, she’d do things differently. Not necessarily on a game level, but on a personal level.
“I wouldn’t go anywhere f****** near a man in a romantic way which I have full capability of doing at this point in my life, maybe I didn’t then,” Herman told Heavy. “I would focus more on fostering really deep relationships with people and using my profession as a coach to get me further in the game.”
The ‘Big Brother’ Norm That Herman Finds Problematic
It’s a regular occurrence in the “Big Brother” house: a houseguest gets frustrated or teary-eyed and is warned to get it together before anyone labels them an “emotional player.”
“When you’re not emotional, that’s viewed as a strength in the Big Brother house which I find to be highly problematic,” Herman says. “I think that you’re a sociopath if you go into that house and you’re able to just play the game. I find that very scary.”
Herman also rejects the notion that gameplay moves are devoid of personal motivations. “There’s always something very personal about every eviction. With Brent, it was personal,” Herman said. “When Sam put Haleigh and me on the block, I’ll never forget, one of the things she said was, “this isn’t game related, it’s completely personal.”
The “Big Brother” alum was referring to Brent Champagne, the most recent houseguest to be evicted. The house targeted him for his arrogance and for making the women in the house uncomfortable.
Herman’s BB23 Predictions
Although she’s personally rooting for Derek F. and Claire, Herman thinks Kyland and Claire might be a good final two prediction. “I don’t think there’s gonna be a big alliance that’s gonna make it to the end,” she said.
Like Kyland, Herman won Head of Household week two of her season. “Kyland is the perfect mix of kind, honest, real, and smart and isn’t someone that gets carried away in drama or putting on a show like I was. I think it’ll be a very long time before people look at Kyland as a threat, if ever,” Herman told Heavy.
This Thursday will be the first endurance HOH comp of the summer and Herman thinks it’s anyone’s game. “It’s very possible we’ll have people that surprise us. Endurance not only has to do with your physical makeup, but it has a lot to do with where your head’s at and how much you want it,” Herman said.
“I’d really like to see Derek F. win the HOH,” the “Big Brother” alum told Heavy. “I feel like he needs it, emotionally, that little boost of morale. I also just want to know where his mind is at and who he wants to put up”
Herman Is a Certified Life Coach
A psychic once told Herman that she was going to be a life coach. While she brushed it off at the time, it soon became the obvious career path for her. She said that people often dismiss the idea of a twenty-something life coach. They figure, what could such a young person really know about life?
Herman says being a life coach isn’t about having all the answers. “I don’t give you advice, I don’t know it all, I don’t know what’s best for you. I was trained to ask you empowering questions to make you realize that you have the answers,” Herman told Heavy.
The Long Island native is also a podcaster. In “Quarter Life Crisis,” she and dietitian Amanda Perrin have honest conversations about personal health and wellness. They cover everything from physical health to mental health to financial health.
Herman is also launching a new podcast later this summer. She describes the podcast as “spirituality and wellness for the person who doesn’t quite know what that is or where to start.”
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