Ariana Madix and Tom Sandoval are still not on speaking terms nearly one year his affair with Raquel Leviss was uncovered. But when Sandoval was struggling during the spring of 2023, his estranged ex reportedly did reach out to him, according to another ex.
Speaking on her podcast “Sex, Love and What Else Matters” podcast, in February 2024, Kristen Doute addressed a “Vanderpump Rules” scene in which Sandoval told Lisa Vanderpump he had dark thoughts following his split from Madix and the death of his childhood best friend Ali soon after.
“Of course when Tom brings up something that is very detrimental regarding suicidal thoughts — that is terrifying,” Doute said on her podcast. “I remember hearing about this back in the Scandoval time in the spring of last year. Not only did Scheana [Shay] reach out to him as she said she did — heartfelt, 100 percent — I too reached out to him. Ariana reached out to him.”
“A lot of us texted Ariana and said, ‘You realize we need to reach out to him, we’ve heard some rumors,’” Doute added. “This wasn’t a secret. We heard some scary things that he was thinking about.”
Lisa Vanderpump Became Upset That Sandoval Did Not Confide in Her About Having Dark Thoughts
Less than three months after his high-profile split from Madix, Sandoval lost his best friend, Ali Rafiq. According to TMZ, Rafiq’s burial took place the day after his death, per Muslim religion. Sandoval was unable to get to St. Louis in time to attend his funeral service.
Sandoval addressed the dark time in his life in a “Vanderpump Rules” scene with Lisa Vanderpump. In the season 11 episode “You’re Not the Queen of the Group,” Sandoval told Vanderpump he felt helpless. “I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t. I [expletive] say I am sorry and I cry then it is [called] crocodile tears,” he said. “I battled with suicide [thoughts].”
Sandoval continued in a confessional. “I was hanging on by a thread,” he said. “The walls start closing and you can’t see past the hurt and the pain. You can’t dream about better days. I was getting to the point where I was like, ‘What is the [expletive] point?”
Vanderpump, who lost her only brother, Mark, to suicide in 2018, chastised Sandoval for not reaching out to her for help.
In a confessional, she said, “Tom Sandoval assured me after the reunion when I called him from the car on the way home. I said, ‘You promise me Tom that if you ever have any thoughts like that …’ And he said, ‘I am not that person. I wouldn’t do that.’ So to hear him say he had those thoughts and he didn’t call me? That scares me the [expletive] daylights out of me.”
Scheana Shay Tried to Reach Out to Sandoval But He Blocked Her on Social Media
In the season 11 premiere episode, titled “Notes On a Scandal,” Scheana Shay said she attempted to reach out to Sandoval to make sure he was okay following Rafiq’s death, but discovered he had blocked her. He also blocked her sister Cortney van Olphen, her podcast “Scheananagins,” and her toddler daughter, Summer Moon, on Instagram.
Shay reacted after Vanderpump spoke to her about Sandoval in the episode “Dog Days of Summer”.
“I really know for a fact he’s in a very dark place,” Vanderpump said.
Shay replied that she was upset that Sandoval was giving “villain energy” by blocking her when she tried to reach out. “He needs to humble himself, have some humility. And I told him to get a good therapist,” Shay said.
In a confessional in the episode “Dog Days of Summer,” Madix said, “I can understand that maybe he’s had some thoughts and some feelings. But those are based on a situation he created in which he didn’t give a [expletive] about anybody else’s mental health. I know I’m a [expletive] for saying this but it just feels a little like, annoying.”
In a confessional, Shay expressed also frustration over Sandoval’s actions. But she later agreed with Vanderpump that it was time to ease up on him.
If you or someone you know is having suicidal thoughts, dial 988 to reach the toll-free Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. Help is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week (dial 888-628-9454 for assistance in Spanish). You can also speak with a trained crisis counselor anytime by texting HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.
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