‘The Voice’ Coach Says He’s Stopped ‘Being So Selfish’ in Relationship

Voice coaches and their wives

Getty John Legend, model Christine Teigen, model Behati Prinsloo and Adam Levine in 2014

When Grammy-winning singer John Legend looks back on his relationship with his wife, model and author Chrissy Teigen, “The Voice” coach says he was “selfish” early on in their relationship. In a new podcast interview, Legend opened up about how he’s grown to be a better partner over the years.

John Legend Says He Wasn’t the Best Partner to Chrissy Teigen Early On

Chrissy Teigen, John Legend

GettyChrissy Teigen and John Legend at the 74th Emmy Awards in September 2022

Legend, 43, and Teigen, 36, married in 2013. They started dating after meeting on the set of one of his music videos in 2006. And though they were very into each other from the start of their romance, Legend revealed on a new episode of the “On Purpose with Jay Shetty” podcast on October 17, 2022, that he “wasn’t a great partner” at the start of their relationship.

“I think I was more selfish then,” he said during the conversation with Shetty, who’s a popular life coach among celebrities and even officiated Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck’s wedding.

“Even though I was very into her and very excited to be with her,” Legend revealed, “I was still selfish. I was in my mid-20s, still not ready to fully be the committed partner that I am now.”

The 12-time Grammy winner said being committed in a relationship requires deciding what’s important and whether you care enough for the other person to derive joy from their happiness.

“Once you really figure out that you love someone and you really love so much about them and you really want to make it work with that person, like you have to decide, ‘I’m going to do the things that I need to do to be a good partner in this relationship,'” he said. “And I’ve just grown as a person ’cause of that too. When you stop being so selfish when you think about not only the joy you get from a situation and the pleasure you get from it, but you also think about your responsibility and your commitment in that situation. I think you just grow, and you mature. I think part of it is it’s just a matter of time. You need time to become that person you want to be.”

John Legend Says Becoming a Dad Also Made Him a Better Man

Chrissy Teigen, John Legend and kids

GettyChrissy Teigen, John Legend and their children, Miles and Luna, at Disneyland in April 2022

Legend told Shetty that the joys and hardships of parenting have also made him a better man and a stronger partner to Teigen. The duo has two kids, Luna, 6, and Miles, 4, with another baby on the way. In September 2020, they lost their baby Jack when Teigen was 20 weeks pregnant. She said doctors couldn’t stop her internal bleeding despite “bags and bags of blood transfusions,” according to her Instagram post at the time.

Legend said working through that profound grief strengthened their foundation as a couple.

“You also have to commit to working through pain, and I think that we both committed to doing it,” he said. “Like doing the work that we needed to do to get through it. And I think having, already had two kids together was definitely helpful because they just bring so much joy into our lives and laughter and fun and they’re great focus for our energy. And even when you’re going through deep grief on losing a pregnancy you still have these two beautiful babies that you love, and I think that was certainly helpful.”

One of Legend’s former colleagues has also been doing a great deal of soul-searching when it comes to his relationship. Legend has not commented on the scandal surrounding Adam Levine, a former coach on “The Voice” who admitted in September 2022 that he “crossed the line” in his marriage after Instagram model Sumner Stroh alleged via social media posts that they had an affair.

“A lot is being said about me right now and I want to clear the air,” he wrote in a statement on September 20. “I used poor judgement in speaking with anyone other than my wife in ANY kind of flirtatious manner. I did not have an affair, nevertheless, I crossed the line during a regrettable period in my life. In certain instances it became inappropriate, I have addressed that and taken proactive steps to remedy this with my family.”

He added, “My wife and my family is all I care about in this world. To be this naive and stupid enough to risk the only thing that truly matters to me was the greatest mistake I could ever make. I will never make it again. I take full responsibility. We will get through it. And we will get through it together.”

Like Legend, Levine’s wife — Behati Prinsloo, whom he married in July 2014 — is expecting their third child. Levine left “The Voice” in May 2019 after 16 seasons of being a coach on the show.

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