Last week: We saw a bunch of awesome elimination fights for both featherweight and bantamweight. If you missed that episode, you should go back and watch them, because they were fantastic. You should also take a look at T.J. Dillashaw’s Ultimate Fighter blog for week 1 while you’re at it.
In the end, we have sixteen fighters – eight from each weight class – moving into the house for what should be an explosive and entertaining season.
Let’s do this.
We open with the traditional shot of the fighters moving into the house. It’s a 12,000 square foot house, but the fighters are told that it’s going to seem like a closet after just a few days. They immediately do exactly what I would do, which is bust open the fridge, pull out a bunch of steaks and sausages and go to town on the grill. The only difference is that I don’t have to make weight.
After the feast, it’s time to pick teams. Bisping wins the coin toss and elects to take the first pick, which means Mayhem gets to make the first fight. The coaches will pick their bantamweight roster followed by the featherweights.
TEAM BISPING: Luis, T.J, John, Josh, Diego, Akira, Marcus, Steven
TEAM MAYHEM: John, Johnny, Dustin, Roland, Dennis, Bryan, Dustin, Steven
Bisping seems confident that he picked the right guys, which, at least in his mind, makes Miller a moron.
Dana White congratulates everyone on the team selections and reiterates the bonuses for the season. He says this show will change their life and that they are representing all of the lower weight class fighters.
Mayhem says he picked a fantastic team and that they’re all working towards the same goal. He tells Bisping that some of his guys look unhappy to be on Team Bisping. Bisping says that was a stupid statement and that Miller is a Strikeforce reject.
We go to the gym for a Team Miller practice. His team says Miller is really connecting with them in the gym. Steven’s nose starts bleeding, so they tape it up. Miller says he’ll feel dumb, but don’t worry – because he can’t feel as dumb as he looks.
Team Bisping hits the gym. They do a mostly technique-based training session, which helps out Marcus Brimmage quite a bit. In fact, he says a little tweak the BJJ coach showed him “blew his mind.” Bisping says he has no idea what strategy Mayhem will use when picking the first fight, but that they have to be ready for anything.
Back at the house, Mayhem comes screeching into the parking lot. He and Ryan bring in some boxes and he says they’re going to fight the other team with information technology. They’ve purchased compression suits for his team, which apparently help push bad blood out and flush good blood into your system. It’s like getting your blood pressure taken, except on the whole body. Mayhem tells them not to share the suits with the other team, and then he screeches out of the parking lot.
FIGHT ANNOUNCEMENT:
Mayhem picks Bryan Caraway from his team. He’ll take on Marcus Brimmage from Team Bisping.
At the gym, Marcus Brimmage starts fight preparation. He says Quinton Jackson and Dragonball Z are his two biggest inspirations. Watching Rampage’s highlights from PRIDE made him want to be a fighter. He goes through the motions with the coaches in the cage. They’re really working on takedown defense, which will be crucial in keeping the fight where Marcus is strongest and Caraway is weakest. Bisping says they can’t change who Marcus is in two days time, but that they can tweak him.
Marcus is currently weighing 157. He needs to get to 146 in two days. He’s a little worried about the weight cut because he doesn’t really know how to do it. Bisping and the coaches show up at the house to help him out. They go through the saltwater bath and sweatsuit routine, which Bisping says will cut 7 pounds easily.
Team Miller training session for Bryan Caraway. Caraway is nervous and says he just wants to go out there and get the fight over with and get a win. Miller says Caraway’s biggest opponent is himself and that he’s a head case. As a side note, Caraway is legendary for getting nervous before his fights, so much so that he tends to vomit before going to the cage.
Team Miller decides to get the pranking started early. They take all of the tires from the gym and put them in Bisping’s locker room, then adjust the tires so that the biggest one is stopping the door from opening.
Time for weigh-ins.
Marcus Brimmage (145) vs. Bryan Caraway (145)
Dana says it was a ballsy move to pick Brimmage as an opponent, as his standup his nasty.
Team Bisping does a military cadence-style chant about the fight. This was entertaining, but Caraway takes it personally. Mayhem says it was the cutest little show tune he’s ever heard.
Bisping is forced to bash his door in to get into the locker room. He says his team will get revenge. It’s going to be a long season if you’re not a fan of hijinks.
Brimmage does a talking head interview and then FARTS in the middle of a sentence. He nonchalantly concludes his interview with “I just farted.” This was pretty funny. And gross. He says he’s a striker, that people like to see ass-whippin’s and he’s here to hand out ass-whippin’s.
I hate to point this out, but Marcus sounds like Cleveland from Family Guy.
MARCUS BRIMMAGE vs. BRYAN CARAWAY (145)
Round 1: Caraway smartly gets the fight to the ground early, and then spends most of the rest of the round working for a rear-naked choke. He doesn’t get it, however, and he’s pretty tired by the end. HeavyMMA.com scores the round 10-9 for Bryan Caraway.
Round 2: Caraway’s exhausted, and Brimmage is able to finally start landing some strikes. Caraway guts it out, however, and gets a takedown midway through the round. He works his way to the back, where he finally secures a fight-ending rear-naked choke. Gutsy performance from Caraway in battling to get the takedown when he was tired and losing the round. He could have been in plenty of trouble standing, but fought through it and won the fight. Bryan Caraway d. Marcus Brimmage via submission (rear naked choke, round 2)
Mayhem says that Caraway’s win sets the tone for all of the guys on his team because Caraway is his “nervous Nellie.”
