Couture To TNA: Wrestling Fans Yawn

 

When I got the message from a friend, I was momentarily excited.

“Did you see Couture is going to TNA? That’s exactly the kind of stupid stuff that killed WCW in the 1990’s.”

In fact, like almost everyone else on the planet, I did not see that Couture had gone to TNA. Total Nonstop Action (also stands for Tits N Ass, get it?) is, charitably, the second best wrestling company in the United States. Second best, only because literally no one else promotes wrestling nationally besides the WWE. If someone did, TNA would immediately be relegated to third place. Thousands watch their television programming and only a handful their pay per views. I was not among the die-hard few.

It’s a wrestling promotion stocked with guys you sort of remember liking fifteen years ago. Remember “Big Daddy Cool” Kevin Nash? He’s there, complete with a gray (not graying) hair and arthritic knees. Scott Steiner? Not the one who barked like a dog and had a carnival barker’s mustache. The other one. He’s there too. And now, I thought, Randy Couture? That could get interesting. Business, as they say, is about to pick up.

Except, of course, it wasn’t Randy Couture. It was his estranged wife Kim, a fighter best known for getting her face brutally smashed by Kim Rose. She is feuding, apparently, with TNA’s Tara, best known for nothing. The two women brawled on PPV, but TNA, as always, got a little too cutesy with it. The idea was to make it look like Kim Couture just got carried away and wasn’t scheduled to be a part of the show. They cut the camera away and pretended like it was unscheduled mayhem. The problem? No one knows or recognizes Kim Couture.

p>>The entire fiasco ended up being a waste of time. No one cares about Kim Couture in MMA and even fewer care about her in pro wrestling. Had TNA tried to glam it up, have a kitschy catfight and a little fun with it, things might have gone all right. It’s the only way to play wrestling these days. It’s like Batman comics. After a decade of grim and dark stories, you have to bring Robin back and have Batman smile now and again. Wrestling needs a few smiles too. This wasn’t one.

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