A good nickname can turn even the most average athlete into a cult favorite, or in some instances an overnight legend.
You can have the athletic ability of a Big Mac without the pickle and yet still get cheered like a rock star every time you walk out to the field, or in the case of a professional fighter, the cage.
Hell, the proper nickname will cause women all around the arena to take their tops off and scream your name like a deranged big breasted psychopath every time your entrance music hits the loudspeakers.
Of course, if you write for Heavy MMA you do not need a nickname as this type of female reaction comes with the territory.
With that being said, mixed martial arts is home to some of the most creative nicknames in all of sports. In honor of Ryan “Darth” Bader’s co-main event bout against Antonio Rogerio Nogueira at UFC 119, let’s take a look at the top 10 most epic nicknames in MMA today.
10. Mark “The Meat Missile” Miller
If Mark Miller lived up to his true potential and just smashed everyone in sight, he would be the most legendary fighter of all time. More legendary than Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, the entire Gracie Family, Godzilla, King Kong, and all four of the Ninja Turtles combined.
Unfortunately Miller hasn’t had the best of success lately, going 1-5 in his last six fights. Nevertheless, how can we not include “The Meat Missile” on this list? The fact that Miller came up with the name during a brunch conversation with his grandma just makes the nickname all the more spectacular.
9. Jeff “The Snowman” Monson
You ever wonder why, on snowy days, kids aren’t building as many snowmen as they used to? Of course it could have something to do with all of that technology mumbo jumbo (kids today love their X-Box 360’s), but the real reason is actually far more complex.
You see, because of Jeff Monson, children are now afraid that there snowmen will come to life and choke them unconscious or snap their arms off with high level jiu-jitsu techniques. So when it’s snowing out and your kid is inside chatting to his girlfriend in China via AIM, don’t blame technology… blame Jeff “The Snowman” Monson.
8. Cristiane “Cyborg” Santos
As the most dominant female fighter in the world, let’s just say Cris “Cyborg” is one scary broad. She could probably step into the Octagon with some of the toughest male fighters in the world and completely demolish them within a five minute time period.
The actual nickname itself isn’t really that original but it fits Santos perfectly as she really does fight like an unstoppable “Cyborg”. Plus I’ve seen Santos choke out MMA reporters before so I figured I’d add her on this list just to make sure she doesn’t set her sights on me next.
7. Roy “Big Country” Nelson
Roy Nelson isn’t exactly what you would call a “physical specimen.” The beautiful thing about “Big Country”, though, is that he embraces his porky physique and in doing so has become a huge favorite among MMA fans.
His love affair with biscuits and gravy aside, Nelson is actually one of the top fighters in his division. He’s also surprisingly very athletic.