Christie Tate, a prolific writer and “mom blogger”, has received pointed criticism after writing on The Washington Post that her nine-year-old daughter had requested that she stop writing about her, and Tate said she wouldn’t stop. Tate also said that her daughter would have veto rights to any photos and they would discuss any articles she was publishing beforehand. Here’s more about Christie Tate and what happened.
1. Tate Said She Wouldn’t Stop Writing About Being a Mother, but Her Daughter Could Veto Photos
Christie Tate wrote an article in The Washington Post on January 3 about how, after receiving a laptop for Christmas, her fourth-grade daughter realized that her mom had been writing about her online for quite some time. “Why are all of these pictures of me on the Internet?” she asked Tate.
Tate acknowledged that she always knew her daughter would one day ask about all the stories she’d written about her. But, she said, she promised her daughter she wouldn’t post any pictures in the future without her permission. However, she couldn’t just take the essays and pictures off the Internet.
Tate went on to share that many other writers stopped writing about their children altogether once they reached a certain age, but she didn’t feel she could do that. Instead, “my plan is to chart a middle course.” She said they’d negotiate boundaries together, but she disagreed with a culture that believes mothers should never do anything that upsets their children or makes them uncomfortable.
She said they agreed that she wouldn’t use any photos without her daughter’s permission, and she had “absolute veto rights” on any images of herself. Tate also said that she would let her daughter known in advance of anything she was writing about her, she’d keep it to a minimum, and maybe her daughter would have editing rights in the future. She’ll also be referring to her by the pseudonym Roshelle instead of her real name.
You can read her full story in The Washington Post here.
2. People Have Taken to Social Media Criticizing Tate’s Decision
Tate said in her story that she and her daughter had reached a compromise about what to share in her articles, but many people have emerged on social media criticizing Tate’s choices to continue writing about her daughter and her son. They say that she really should be respecting her daughter’s wishes and desire for privacy and not pushing to write more about her. Here are some of the criticisms people have shared on Twitter:
In some cases, it appears that some might have missed the part of the article where Tate said that she’d tell her daughter in advance about topics and might let her edit stories in the future. But others did see that and still believe that Tate’s ultimate decision was wrong.
Others said Tate made the decision just to further her own career.
Although it’s easy to find the people who disagree with Tate, there are some commenting on social media that they agree with her and appreciate her honesty. Here are some of those tweets:
3. Tate Has Blogged About Motherhood & Her Life for More than a Decade
Tate’s life has been devoted to blogging for more than a decade. In 2008, she wrote about her wedding on a Blogspot called Bridled with Joy. The blog ended in December 2008, and she continued on Bundled with Joy. In July 2010 she started a new blog called Swaddled with Joy. The blog continued until February 2012, when she discontinued her “With Joy” series of blogs to start a new website.
Tate started Outlaw Mama in 2013. She continued that blog until late 2017. After writing a memoir about group therapy called “How to Change Your Love Life in 800 Therapy Sessions,” she started a new website simply called Christie Tate. She now writes for sites like The New York Times, Pithead Chapel, The Washington Post, Easy Street, and more.
4. She’s Known for Being Brutally Honest & Transparent in Her Blogs
Tate is known for her brutal honesty and transparency in her blogs and articles. She wrote for Pithead Chapel about how her friend Meredith was dying and she couldn’t stop telling everyone around her about what was happening. She wrote, “To remind myself that Meredith, for now, is very much alive and a living, breathing friend of mine, I text her every day. Stuff about my therapy sessions. Tidbits about Jeff or my work schedule. She knows I’m trying to go a year without shopping, so I’ll confess to her when I sneak stuff into my shopping cart at Nordstrom.com.”
In 2016, she wrote about suffering from PTSD because of seeing a friend’s father drown at the beach 30 years earlier.
Tate recently shared on Twitter that one of her pieces was accepted on Monday, after another piece was rejected on Wednesday, and she can’t stop obsessing over the rejected piece.
One person suggested that she should obsess on acceptance and celebrate the good, and she agreed. “Wallowing is not productive or spiritually useful,” Tate replied.
While writing about her latest rejections, she hasn’t responded to any criticisms online about her decision regarding her daughter. Instead, she took time to encourage someone else who had a negative experience from a reader.
5. Christie Tate Is a Lawyer in Chicago
In addition to her prolific writing and blogging career, Tate is also a lawyer in Chicago. She graduated from Texas A&M University and then obtained her law degree from Loyola University – Chicago, Il. She works for Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom LLP in Chicago. She’s been practicing law since 2003.
Do you agree or disagree with Tate’s decision? Let us know in the comments below.