Bet you forgot about O.J. Simpson, didn’t you? He’s been keeping quiet, though not by choice. The Juice has been serving a 9- to 33-year sentence for kidnapping and armed robbery since his conviction in 2008. Simpson apparently has a couple new nicknames to add to the roster — “The Godfather” and “Daddy Juice” — and a bunch of new heavily speculated drama to go along with them, namely his suspected homosexuality.
Yes, it appears that Simpson got deeper in touch with his sexuality as his freedom melted away before his eyes. According to uncorroborated, anonymous sources, Daddy Juice has a posse of transgendered homosexual men in the clink, coloquially referred to as “The Girls.” The source, supposedly a former inmate with Simpson, told the National Enquirer that Simpson exclusively hangs out with The Girls, trading massages for candy bars and the like.
What’s more, Simpson reportedly “puts on a show” for his fellow inmates when he works out, which is great if you’re into watching 65-year-old acquitted murderers pump iron. “He’s like a God to the other inmates,” an “insider” told the Enquirer. “He prances around flexing his muscles, wearing only a pair of gym shorts.”
Daddy Juice, or “DJ” from the Girls, has even gone so far as to throw a Super Bowl party for his fellow inmates. What, you didn’t think they had parties in lockup? According to the Daily Mail, Simpson is one of the only inmates to be able to afford a television from the inmate store, so he crammed all his best jail buds into his 80-square-foot cell to watch the game.
Simpson allegedly cared more about the players’ physiques than the game itself, even though his former team, the San Francisco 49ers, was playing. According to an unnamed source, he wouldn’t shut up about Baltimore Ravens receiver Anquan Boldin, saying “Anquan is my man! What a great-looking guy!”
This report from the Enquirer looks remarkably different from this article from earlier in his sentence, in which the Enquirer says that Juice was beaten unconscious by a skinhead and was afraid to leave his cell for weeks. Sounds pretty well-liked to me.
Guests were apparently fighting for an invitation to the party thrown by the man (strangely, almost lovingly) dubbed The Godfather. We won’t know much more until a verifiable witness, or Daddy Juice himself, comes forward with more definitive answers. Until then, it’s pretty funny to imagine the disgraced football star flanked by his posse, bulging his biceps for all the jealous onlookers.