The 20 Most Bizarre Parade Floats of All Time

Thanksgiving parades are a U.S. tradition — an All-American display of good clean fun. But some people just need to be banned from the use of paper-mache. They can’t dress up a flatbed trailer without building a big dong or crucifying Jesus. From the pornographic to the political — sometimes both at once — we bring you the most effed-up floats in the history of parades.

Maybe he’s compensating for a small crop.

Religion: Taking the fun out of parades since forever.

Someone should definitely make sure that “papa” never gets the boys.

It’s a flaming d*ck that looks like a lion from the right angle.

He’s had his eye on her for a while.

We just want to know “why?”

It’s weird…but it’s also awesome.

We wouldn’t have given crazy eyes on the left a nickle.

One of the more positive reasons for Hell to exist.

We’re not sure we understand the politics involved, but it’s hilarious.

Now that’s having the Book thrown at you.

A torture bassinet carried by pasty white guys? Gay Pride month is June, fellas.

It’s not what it looks like?

Where are her hands, exactly?

Very popular among the lady floats.

Something is being implied here…

Everyone was having a good time…until the baby graveyard rolled by.

Everyone knows that Steuerzahler had it coming.

We’d recognize that Japanese sodomy tree anywhere.

Godzilla Vs. Ahmadinejad: Battle For The Planet

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