Rammstein’s New Porn (Er – Music) Video

RammsteinOkay, so Rammstein did porn for their new music video. No, really, they actually did. Theres a couple of questions I have about this whole thing. First of all, Rammstein? Still? Really? Didn’t they have one song and then they were done? Theres really no accounting for the taste of Germans, I guess.

So it’s about 8:30 AM and no one else is in the office. We’re going to do a fun little experiment where I watch the video and write about it at the same time (2 screens FTW) and hope to God that no one walks in on me.

I’m about a minute in and, oh wait, there it is, there’s the tittles. Oops, and there’s the bondage too. They’re hitting all the different angles here. I wonder how they picked the band member who wanted to -wait, is she really eating a sausage in a sexy way? Thats a gross sausage, but I guess that’s what Germans are into, all those schnitzels and wursts and such. Still no actual boning yet. We’re still comfortably in Cinemax territory.

Wait, some BJ and some cross dressing. Is that Garth from Wayne’s World?! Some self filming. Um. Oh, boy. We’re crossing through Spice Channel land into something seriously disturbed. I think he just said “You have a pussy I have a dick-A, so whats the problem, lets do it quick”. Oops, theres the boning. Yup, this Rammstein video is actually porn. Why am I watching this at work? Someone is going to walk in on me, HOLY HELL FOUR CONSECUTIVE MONEY SHOTS. CTRL-W ALT-F4 CLEAR HISTORY, CLEAR IT AGAIN.

Christ, I think I need to go have a cigarette now.

Ps: The phrase “meat rifle” is used.

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