Celebrities

Heidi Montag Plastic Surgery Timeline

People Magazine recently ran a very disturbing story about The Hills bimbo Heidi Montag and her senses-shattering ten plastic surgeries in one day. Montag, a Trainwreck 100 inductee, has stated that she first got surgery because people in high school made fun of her, but now she’s just trying to stay competitive in her quest to become a pop starlet. Under the jump, a timeline of Montag’s plastic evolution, plus we use our exclusive Time Cameras to get photos of her future surgeries.

Heidi Montag 2006

Montag in 2006. Note she looks like a normal human being. This won’t last.

Heidi Montag 2007

Montag in 2007. Breast enlargement, rhinoplasty and collagen lip injections have her looking something like a reasonably well-kept prostitute.

Heidi Montag 2010

Montag in 2010. Second breast enlargement to a DDD, brow lift, Botox in forehead, liposuction on waist, hips and thighs, nose job revised, fat injected into cheeks and lips, chin reduction, neck liposuction, buttock augmentation. All that to look like a rejected host for USA Up All Night.

Heidi Montag 2011

Montag in 2011, after her second album is only released on MySpace, which no longer exists. Breasts further enlarged to GGG. Four ribs removed. Chin further sculpted. Fingers extended. Shoulders filed down. Eye sockets enlarged and eyelids peeled back. Additional brow lift. Additional collagen in lips. Navel size decreased. Vaginal rejuvenation (not shown).

Heidi Montag 2012

Montag in 2012, after being beaten out by Rihanna to present a Kid’s Choice Award. Full-body skin darkening. Hair darkening using permanently bonded petrochemical polymers. Buttock implants. Additional collagen in lips. Vaginal rejuvenation (not shown).

Heidi Montag 2013

Montag in 2013. Japanese fashion and style have swept America once more, and Montag is desperate to cash in. Full-body skin bleaching. Breast implants extracted and additional skin removed. Buttock implants removed. Lips restructured. Four teeth removed from jaw. Eyes restructured. Additional nose width reduction. Tattoo on stomach reads “Crazy Diarrhea” in Mandarin Chinese. Vaginal reconstruction (not shown).

Heidi Montag 2013

Montag two weeks later in 2013. Tattoo removed. Vaginal reconstruction (not shown).

Heidi Montag 2015

Montag in 2015. Additional facial reconstruction. Breast implants replaced and increased to a ZZZ, the largest size ever attempted. Anal reconstruction (not shown). Three weeks later, she was dead. Will be dead. In the future.

Respond To This

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

More Celebrities you need to know

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 445 other followers